Thursday, January 1, 2026

Letter to Aindri on her 11th birthday

Dearest jhia, 

You are 11!

First things first, this is your first birthday outside of India.

Quite unique, isn't it? So yeah, this marks the most important change in the past year.

But rewind to your 10th birthday celebrations. We had it in Valley View (again) and you seemed to quite like that idea.  Mom painstakingly built a "Jasmine" themed cake. Fondant, butter cream, tiered, decoration, etc, the usual routine on 2nd Jan followed (while you went to school). All our friends of Manipal were in attendance. It was a large gathering of about 35 people. By that time, we were also anticipating our movement to Malaysia, so we were also seeing it as a large gathering before we leave. Anyway each of your birthday we have invited all our friends at Manipal and it has always been a lovely time.

A few days after your birthday, we went to Bangalore. Sweden folks had come down and we went to spend some time with them. By that time our final dates to move to Melaka were not final but it was in the offing. We also met Rishu, the cute little boy, during that trip. 

You had your school annual day a few days later. And you had always been very excited for it. This year you got to dance. As usual we were the excited parents coming to school early and taking the best seats. You danced very well and you were so happy that your Vice Principal Ms Jyothi Santhosh appreciated your performance. A few days later we also did a trip with Aadya Shetty and her family and drove to Mudigere and stayed there for a night. I think you enjoyed that trip.

Utsav came of course at the end of March. As usual the grind that had been happening for the last 10 years happened. It was to be my 10th and last as Secretary, CCC. You had been an integral part of all these right since your childhood. I guess one of the highlights was when Dr Ballal announced in the valedictory about my leaving, which stunned you (and a lot of people who did not know until that point)

Tough goodbyes

By now the dates were decided and we started packing and saying good byes to people at Manipal. You were of course not vey happy about it because Manipal was what you had seen and lived all the 10 years of your life. It was extremely tough for me too, to leave the place we had made home. But we did start meeting people, going to their houses, meeting for dinners, etc. We had received so much love and affection from people and it was hard to say bye, but it is important sometimes to move forward and that can involve moving away. Physical distance may increase but the love, the fondness does not change. They change their shapes yes and it can be tough to see that change happening, but it is an important phenomenon in life and one must accept that happily, mindfully, and move on. 

Leaving our home, which we built ourselves, in which we had the best of times was tough. You loved every part of our home, from your 'sundar' bedroom to the floor, to everything. But we were to make a move for something new and possibly better. 

Few weeks before we were to leave, Jema, Jepa, Trisha nani, Hitesh Fufa came over and we had a good time with all of them. We went to Hasta Shilpa village, the boat ride in Swarna river, restaurants, etc. 

Melaka in May

The day finally arrived. Shobha aunty & Ullas mama came home to say bye; your friends Aadya Vemala and Saanvi Bhat dropped as a surprise. It was a very emotional moment. We left from Mangalore to Bangalore and then to Kuala Lumpur and arrived in Melaka on 3rd May, a Saturday. A new place, we were received by former colleagues from Manipal and the sense of familiarity was a relief. Ganesh uncle, Anand uncle, Nagalakshmi aunty, they were all there in the morning.

We settled in in the staff quarters and as soon as Monday, 5th May came, we were filled with another worry - of leaving you alone at home. Something we had never done in all these years. I was suggesting we put cameras to see you, but Mummy said that wouldn't be required, as you were a very responsible girl. The office timings here were 8-5, though we could come home for lunch. That left you alone for a very long time at home. But you did well. Though your screen time increased with watching tab but you did well.

The next concern was school. We went to see a couple of schools though with our prior planning we had decided to send you to Melaka Expatriate School. Thankfully you liked it better than the other schools. However, the session was underway and we planned to send you at that start of the year (September 1 in this case).

This left you with nearly 4 months of being school-less! But it passed and passed well. You have in fact, though reluctantly, read 5-6 books in these months.

We were regularly going for shopping trips on Wednesday and Friday in the college vehicle, a routine you started loving. We explored many things at Melaka starting from Jonkers street, food joints, Mahakota mall, big Aeon, small Aeon, Mixue!, and other new things. You found new love in Kari Maggi, a change from the Indian maggi. You began to like these Sanrio things (rolls eyes) like Kuromi, Cinnamoroll, etc, etc and of course wanted all of them all the time.

New school - new beginnings

School started in September and we were worried how it will be. The curriculum, Cambridge curriculum, is pretty different from CBSE which you were used to. The approach of subjects is different, the books are presented differently and they are really good - as teachers of so many years we could see that. But it was not easy to pick as it demands different approach. 

Your class just had 10 kids, you were the 11th and that is a sea change from how it was in India. You started making new friends, maneuvering the school staircase, the teachers (Mr Morias), lunch time, and other things. It has just been 3 months and the journey has been fine. This December holiday you did say that you were bored and wanted to go to school. You have decided to have lunch provided at school. Which is also a testimony that you have taken to the food here.

Newer things

Among new things in Malaysia, we met Vinod uncle and family a few times in these months, you had a good time with Hari bhaiya. We also went to a Chinese wedding (of our former student Rachel) and it was a unique experience. We reconnected with Mummy's school friend, Anshul mama and their family which includes Snow the most well behaved dog. By the end of November we purchased the new car (you are calling it Aphro) 

The end of the year brought with it a heartbreak with Nani-ma being diagnosed with advanced cancer. You went with Mummy to Calcutta to see her. She is doing well in body and spirit until now but you know how difficult it can get. You were upset but having seen Nanu earlier as a kid, you have a very good understanding of these difficult health conditions, which has been, sadly, part of you since forever. But what is important is that it has not deterred anything. We have been strong and practical and resolute in dealing with these things. It gives you character and a unique strength to deal with things. It also tells you what priorities in life are. We do not know how this year is going to be for Nani but whatever it is we will deal with it and you will always have her love and blessings.

The world that was

The world in the past year was as crazy as it could get. There has been a sense of despondency overall. The Trump administration in America has been in news for all the wrong reason. There is a wave against good scientific temper in America (as well as in India), against immigrants. The wars in Ukraine and Gaza continues, and other small ones have popped up, and they have been normalized. There have only been pockets of uplifting initiatives. You are still studying Roman history and will need some time to understand these things.

Whatever it is, remember, kindness will move the world forward. You must be kind to yourself first, then to everyone around you. There is much value in goodness.

Technological advancements are on a rise. the quest for the space or Mars is continuing. Artificial Intelligence continues to be part of our everyday lives, though many think the bubble might burst soon. Australia banned social media for under 16 year olds, which has been lauded. You were very keen on having a phone for this birthday which was vetoed of course, and for good reason.

So, concluding...

The year 2025 has been a roller coaster. Moving countries is definitely not an usual thing, at least for us, and you did it and did it well. Looking back, you must be commended for your support, even though it was not easy for you. You are adapting to the new school and hope you do it well, sooner than later. You are desperately wanting to be a teen. 

You still love your songs, you have diversified into English and Korean (black pink et. al.,) and your dance (large part of the 4 months at home before school) and those stupid YouTube videos (watching which has drastically reduced) and your Mixue boba tea. And the birthday cake, which Mummy has to make. And which she has, despite not having oven yet. That said, you are a very understanding girl, much mature for your age.

I hope you keep your innocence. I hope you adapt to the world quickly because so many things are suddenly changing. I hope you continue to be the determined (for getting things, read material objects, that you want) girl that you are.

On that note, I love you the most!

Papa.

Wednesday, August 20, 2025

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Thursday, January 2, 2025

Letter to Aindri on her 10th birthday

 Dearest jhia,

You are 10!

Reflecting on the chaotic, tense, on the tenterhooks morning that this day was a decade back, it seems like a long way; and yet it seems just like yesterday. The heaviness of having to handle a 1185 grams premature child made 10 years look eons away back then. But, here we are, today, on yet another milestone, of you having made 10 rounds around the sun!

Your constant, year long, infective (irritating too), effervescent enthusiasm for your birthday continues into this year as well. And it is a lovely thing to have. Never let it go. Never let the cynicisms of growing older take away from you this keenness, this desire, this self love.

The year began as usual for us on your 9th birthday; and this time Jema, Jepa were with us. We decided to go a little big this time and organized your birthday at Fortune Inn Valley View. The regular, dear friends were invited and everyone turned up - about 40 of them. The highlight, your birthday cake, as per your demand (and you are making a lot of them now) was a mermaid cake. Your mother baked a stunning looking and delicious tasting one. She spent the whole morning making the layered cake, with fondant work, a colorful one, which wowed everyone in the evening. You were happy for your friends had come in large numbers and all of you got a lot of space to play.

Jepa had his knee surgery after a few days and was recuperating at home for a long time. You were a good kid helping with stuff. Later in the same month, we went to Benaras to attend Shyamsundar mama's wedding. North of India in the chilling cold was a first for you. It was excruciatingly cold for us, but we had fun nevertheless. You met a lot of people, ad so did I, and for the first time in all these years, a lot of people from your mother's side. We went to the Kashi Vishwanath temple in wee hours, had kachori sabzi, malaiyo, etc. It was a fun trip.

After we got back, you fell ill. There was fever and it got exacerbated on taking the antibiotics. We were worried, you were running very high fever. It turned out you are allergic to sulfa antibiotics. This is something you need to remember going forward though. Well, March came and I got busy with Utsav as usual. But by now we had planned our second Europe trip.

This time the plan was to visit the Scandinavian countries. As usual, the planning had followed several weeks. We flew through Munich, Germany this time. The snow clad Alps as we descended to Munich was a sight to behold. We went to Stockholm then. This time we had decided to spend more time with family in Stockholm compared to the previous edition in 2022. 

The unique thing that was planned by Badda and Meshu was to have a cruise tour. We went to the beautiful capital of Estonia, Tallin. You had in fact, as preparation, learnt a song on Estonia. The cruise was interesting. Later we went to the beautiful Norway. First, we went to the capital Oslo and then to the breathtaking Bergen. The Oslo-Bergen train was a picturesque one - we saw so much snow for the first time. From Bergen we flew to Copenhagen, the capital of Denmark. Museums, palaces, canal tour - it was fun. Earlier in Skansen in Stockholm, where you enjoyed a lot, you had a new shoe which was not very comfortable and you had twisted your foot. That was an irritant throughout the rest of the trip.

The trip was loaded with good food, be it the delectable waffle just below the apartment or lunch at the Belgian restaurant in Tallin, or the fresh blueberries & strawberries. You needed Indian food, so did I, once in a while and we even had Biriyani from the Indian restaurant at Citybox Bergen. You purchased, was gifted, your requirement of stationery, etc, and thus ended the Europe trip.

We drove to Goa, another first, during the Independence Day holidays. We stayed at South Goa and it was a wonderful time - with a majority of time spent in the swimming pool, which you don't seem to get enough of. We went to Mumbai for Diwali and spent 3 days there. Nani ma went with us and we had fun visiting Filmcity there. We went to Odisha in December, with you missing classes even, but it was a fun trip. We went to Puri and you will remember the jostling for darshan there for quite some time to come. We went to Nandankanan where I guess seeing the White tiger, Melanistic Tiger, Royal Bengal Tiger were highlights. We spent a lot of time with Reet & Ronil kaka.

This year we repeated your MRI brain and EEG which you were very cooperative undergoing. Your many years of partner, Sanofi suddenly stopped production of Valparin and it was a tense few weeks before we switched to the pink color, and sweeter version by Abbott. You still aren't keen on takin tablets.

This year you continued watching increasing number of movies, thanks to Netflix & Prime. You are still watching, for the thousandth time, Bheem, Shin Chan, etc. Your love for potato chips & spicy food continue unabated. This year saw new people coming into our lives. Tingiya's kid, who you have named Rishu was born in September. You secured position in school in public speaking. 

The world in the past year has only been crazy. The Israel Palestine conflict has been continuing with Israel killing a lot of Palestinians. The US saw a regime change with Donald Trump coming back to power. The Russia-Ukraine war is still continuing. South Korea had an attempted coup. 

The use of Artificial Intelligence has been on a rise. You are now familiar with what is called as ChatGPT. This is a generative AI. There are scores more and they are growing each day, getting incorporated into everything. In a few years time, by the time you are in higher education, AI would have matured a lot. It may take various shapes, we don't know yet. It may replace people in jobs, it will change the nature of jobs, it will add new dimension to different professions. The robot revolution is also gaining pace and so is space exploration, thanks to SpaceX and other private companies.

You are much more mature this year. Your sense of humor is very nice, unlike mine, which is non existent. Your passion for singing continues (you met Kavita Krishnamurty outside visa office in Bangalore). You conversations with friends is very interesting and there is this shadow of teenage which is falling forward I see.

Ten years always seemed very far off. But here we are. It feels like an achievement almost.

But then, the journey of parents is forever.

We love you the most, jhia.

Papa

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