The Toxicity of Twitter

 

(Pic source: https://www.atulhost.com/6-biggest-problems-social-media)

There is no escaping it. 

But is there something we can do?

Well there has much been written on perils of social media, umpteen research have now shown the ill effects of spending too much time on it, concerns of privacy of data has hit the headlines recently, and at the same time the user numbers are increasing, new platforms are emerging and the growth curve of social media is on the rise.

What do you want?

The first question that one should ask from one’s social media choice is what one wants out of it. Is it news you want to follow, music, art, politics, literature, whatever it is, there are pages, handles which will be of your interest and a wise thing to do is to restrict oneself to those.

But, it is often not the case. We want to keep abreast with happenings around the world; we want to see what a particular leader, a head of the state, has to say, for these things have bearing on our life and even if it does not one generally likes to be well informed.

And then there is the professor, your relatives, colleagues at work, friends, whom one follows, because that is how social media is a microcosm of the society we live in.

There starts the problem.

The TL (timeline) then starts filling up with stuff beyond our areas of interest.

In such a scenario one is conflicted when one sees that the colleague from work, otherwise a sane guy, is a bigot on Twitter. One is conflicted when one sees the professor peddling fake news.

What to do then?

Unfollow and sanitize your TL?

Ideally yes, but practically tough to do.

One can rather adopt this path. (I have done this on few occasions and plan to do it more aggressively in due course of time).

Check for your own bias

Disagreement, not toeing the same line, ideological differences, should not mean drastic measures. One should first check for ones own bias. Difficult, yet possible.

      Quality of argument

One should give the person one is disagreeing with some merit by critically analyzing the quality of their argument. If the points they make, makes sense, even if one is diabolically opposed to it.

Drawing lines

However we all have strict no go areas. Bigotry, racism, derogatory comments, whatever is ones absolute no-no area must be clear. Anyone crossing that should not be given benefit of doubt.

    

      Talk, if possible

In the example of the professor who peddles fake news that I cited, it might be the case that he is unaware of how to check veracity, to not be impulsive in posting, etc. If possible talk to him. Same with friends and colleagues.

      Do not feed trolls

This golden rule is very important. The troll is not just that handle with 3 followers and 10K tweets. It is the same professor, the same colleague that we are talking about. Avoid engaging with them on a public platform. It is pointless.

Don’t make a scene (if that is your way)

It might be difficult to unfollow that professor or colleague. Use mute option or any such feature where their posts do not appear on your TL in case you don’t want them to come ask you why you unfollowed them (lot of people do, and ugly RL scene ensues)

Dump them

If you are clear about your choices, you give a damn to what people might think, you have a healthy RL relation with people you engage with on social media, just dump the ones you feel are spreading negativity on your TL.

It is all easier said than done. When the mere ‘like’ of one you follow appear prominently on your TL, when news handles themselves indulge in all sorts of whataboutery, misinformation and bias, it is difficult to sanitize ones TL. Yet one can do it to a large extent.

For people who have been on the scene since a long time, they might have figured a way of doing it right, but for many who make new entry, for the purpose of having fun, to learn things, to engage meaningfully, the toxicity of social media can generally cause much negativity in their lives.

In the end it is imperative to understand that duels on social media, one-upmanship, belittling others, being caustic, is not going to change anything. You are the world and the world is within you. Improvisation and enriching of your being by learning an art form, reading books, spending time with family, watching movies, etc, is primary. Social media, much down the list.

Letter to Aindri on her 3rd birthday

My dear Chimpu,

You are 3 years old now. 

This past year can be called as the ‘year of the gab’. Yes, you started talking and you did talk a lot of it, and along with it many scores of things that melts heart.

Hindi, Odia, English and Kannanda, in the decreasing order were what you learnt and spoke. Your love for songs continued unabated. You sang more, sang better I must admit and sang variety. However it was dance with which you entertained us. 

The year 2017 (and I think being a 2^nd Jan kid, it will be easy to keep a tab of the year easily) began fine with your birthday which was well attended and was a nice little function. Luckily the gifts you received are mostly intact after a year. You have not been, until now, the kid who smashes things. The operative phrase there is until now.

We made a quick trip to Goa in the last week of March and as it always is, we were mighty apprehensive about you and travel. But it was a good road trip by Biju mamu’s car. Well, how much your parents love Goa came to the fore when we repeated the trip, this time by train, in November. The second time around we were a little relaxed and let you play in the pool from where you refused to come. Trisha nani and Hitesh fufaa also made a visit then and met us.

The past year will also be marked by another special event. You started going to school. Having decided to send you to a small school, Minions, close by to home, we were happy that you were happy to go there. But that lasted just for a couple of days. You were in no mood to go there. Now since 2^nd of December you have been going to Sonia play school and continuing your routine of crying for an hour in total! It is distressing for us; yet, the routine has to be set. So, sorry if you feel we have been cruel.

You have grown taller, almost reaching my waist in this year. Your food time tantrums are on a rise. Given the premature baby that you are, I am wondering if you are picking these naughty habits a little late! But your love for shawarma from Dishes, American Onion and Cheese potato chips, donuts from Crave, they are all fine. Which makes me think, you are becoming a bit like your father, being fastidious about food?

Your sleeping habits continued to keep us up for a large part of the year but they were better than the previous year. When your mother had to be admitted for inter vertebral disc prolapse (don’t worry about the jargon) you acted very mature by going alone with me, letting me put you to sleep, give you food, bathe you, etc. The way you spent the evening with your friend Tingia when we had to go to emergency will always be remembered by us.

The world in 2017 is a strange place. You will be easily bored to learn about the society, the politics, the geopolitics, that is shaping the world but at some point in your life you will perhaps understand it all. As a parent, I hope humankind keeps striving to make the world a better place for kids like you for when you grow up you should inhabit a place that is befitting for the energy, the enthusiasm, the vibrancy of your youth.

Well, the year had two set of visits from Jema and jepa and nanu and nani ma. It is now clear that people visiting us and your becoming naughty are interrelated. They all love you a lot, much more than what you can think. 

Again, there were plenty of times this past year when we thought if we were doing the parenting act fine. I thought I was being upset with you when you would throw a thing, not eat, not listen, and it was much more than before. If I have been unreasonable (and I am sure defying what impression a tiny tot like you give, you kids understand all that) then I am apologetic. 

We are all set for your birthday. Hoping all things good come your way this year and you have the courage to fight the not-so-good..

Love you loads!

Papa