Letter to Aindri on her 11th birthday

Dearest jhia, 

You are 11!

First things first, this is your first birthday outside of India.

Quite unique, isn't it? So yeah, this marks the most important change in the past year.

But rewind to your 10th birthday celebrations. We had it in Valley View (again) and you seemed to quite like that idea.  Mom painstakingly built a "Jasmine" themed cake. Fondant, butter cream, tiered, decoration, etc, the usual routine on 2nd Jan followed (while you went to school). All our friends of Manipal were in attendance. It was a large gathering of about 35 people. By that time, we were also anticipating our movement to Malaysia, so we were also seeing it as a large gathering before we leave. Anyway each of your birthday we have invited all our friends at Manipal and it has always been a lovely time.

A few days after your birthday, we went to Bangalore. Sweden folks had come down and we went to spend some time with them. By that time our final dates to move to Melaka were not final but it was in the offing. We also met Rishu, the cute little boy, during that trip. 

You had your school annual day a few days later. And you had always been very excited for it. This year you got to dance. As usual we were the excited parents coming to school early and taking the best seats. You danced very well and you were so happy that your Vice Principal Ms Jyothi Santhosh appreciated your performance. A few days later we also did a trip with Aadya Shetty and her family and drove to Mudigere and stayed there for a night. I think you enjoyed that trip.

Utsav came of course at the end of March. As usual the grind that had been happening for the last 10 years happened. It was to be my 10th and last as Secretary, CCC. You had been an integral part of all these right since your childhood. I guess one of the highlights was when Dr Ballal announced in the valedictory about my leaving, which stunned you (and a lot of people who did not know until that point)

Tough goodbyes

By now the dates were decided and we started packing and saying good byes to people at Manipal. You were of course not vey happy about it because Manipal was what you had seen and lived all the 10 years of your life. It was extremely tough for me too, to leave the place we had made home. But we did start meeting people, going to their houses, meeting for dinners, etc. We had received so much love and affection from people and it was hard to say bye, but it is important sometimes to move forward and that can involve moving away. Physical distance may increase but the love, the fondness does not change. They change their shapes yes and it can be tough to see that change happening, but it is an important phenomenon in life and one must accept that happily, mindfully, and move on. 

Leaving our home, which we built ourselves, in which we had the best of times was tough. You loved every part of our home, from your 'sundar' bedroom to the floor, to everything. But we were to make a move for something new and possibly better. 

Few weeks before we were to leave, Jema, Jepa, Trisha nani, Hitesh Fufa came over and we had a good time with all of them. We went to Hasta Shilpa village, the boat ride in Swarna river, restaurants, etc. 

Melaka in May

The day finally arrived. Shobha aunty & Ullas mama came home to say bye; your friends Aadya Vemala and Saanvi Bhat dropped as a surprise. It was a very emotional moment. We left from Mangalore to Bangalore and then to Kuala Lumpur and arrived in Melaka on 3rd May, a Saturday. A new place, we were received by former colleagues from Manipal and the sense of familiarity was a relief. Ganesh uncle, Anand uncle, Nagalakshmi aunty, they were all there in the morning.

We settled in in the staff quarters and as soon as Monday, 5th May came, we were filled with another worry - of leaving you alone at home. Something we had never done in all these years. I was suggesting we put cameras to see you, but Mummy said that wouldn't be required, as you were a very responsible girl. The office timings here were 8-5, though we could come home for lunch. That left you alone for a very long time at home. But you did well. Though your screen time increased with watching tab but you did well.

The next concern was school. We went to see a couple of schools though with our prior planning we had decided to send you to Melaka Expatriate School. Thankfully you liked it better than the other schools. However, the session was underway and we planned to send you at that start of the year (September 1 in this case).

This left you with nearly 4 months of being school-less! But it passed and passed well. You have in fact, though reluctantly, read 5-6 books in these months.

We were regularly going for shopping trips on Wednesday and Friday in the college vehicle, a routine you started loving. We explored many things at Melaka starting from Jonkers street, food joints, Mahakota mall, big Aeon, small Aeon, Mixue!, and other new things. You found new love in Kari Maggi, a change from the Indian maggi. You began to like these Sanrio things (rolls eyes) like Kuromi, Cinnamoroll, etc, etc and of course wanted all of them all the time.

New school - new beginnings

School started in September and we were worried how it will be. The curriculum, Cambridge curriculum, is pretty different from CBSE which you were used to. The approach of subjects is different, the books are presented differently and they are really good - as teachers of so many years we could see that. But it was not easy to pick as it demands different approach. 

Your class just had 10 kids, you were the 11th and that is a sea change from how it was in India. You started making new friends, maneuvering the school staircase, the teachers (Mr Morias), lunch time, and other things. It has just been 3 months and the journey has been fine. This December holiday you did say that you were bored and wanted to go to school. You have decided to have lunch provided at school. Which is also a testimony that you have taken to the food here.

Newer things

Among new things in Malaysia, we met Vinod uncle and family a few times in these months, you had a good time with Hari bhaiya. We also went to a Chinese wedding (of our former student Rachel) and it was a unique experience. We reconnected with Mummy's school friend, Anshul mama and their family which includes Snow the most well behaved dog. By the end of November we purchased the new car (you are calling it Aphro) 

The end of the year brought with it a heartbreak with Nani-ma being diagnosed with advanced cancer. You went with Mummy to Calcutta to see her. She is doing well in body and spirit until now but you know how difficult it can get. You were upset but having seen Nanu earlier as a kid, you have a very good understanding of these difficult health conditions, which has been, sadly, part of you since forever. But what is important is that it has not deterred anything. We have been strong and practical and resolute in dealing with these things. It gives you character and a unique strength to deal with things. It also tells you what priorities in life are. We do not know how this year is going to be for Nani but whatever it is we will deal with it and you will always have her love and blessings.

The world that was

The world in the past year was as crazy as it could get. There has been a sense of despondency overall. The Trump administration in America has been in news for all the wrong reason. There is a wave against good scientific temper in America (as well as in India), against immigrants. The wars in Ukraine and Gaza continues, and other small ones have popped up, and they have been normalized. There have only been pockets of uplifting initiatives. You are still studying Roman history and will need some time to understand these things.

Whatever it is, remember, kindness will move the world forward. You must be kind to yourself first, then to everyone around you. There is much value in goodness.

Technological advancements are on a rise. the quest for the space or Mars is continuing. Artificial Intelligence continues to be part of our everyday lives, though many think the bubble might burst soon. Australia banned social media for under 16 year olds, which has been lauded. You were very keen on having a phone for this birthday which was vetoed of course, and for good reason.

So, concluding...

The year 2025 has been a roller coaster. Moving countries is definitely not an usual thing, at least for us, and you did it and did it well. Looking back, you must be commended for your support, even though it was not easy for you. You are adapting to the new school and hope you do it well, sooner than later. You are desperately wanting to be a teen. 

You still love your songs, you have diversified into English and Korean (black pink et. al.,) and your dance (large part of the 4 months at home before school) and those stupid YouTube videos (watching which has drastically reduced) and your Mixue boba tea. And the birthday cake, which Mummy has to make. And which she has, despite not having oven yet. That said, you are a very understanding girl, much mature for your age.

I hope you keep your innocence. I hope you adapt to the world quickly because so many things are suddenly changing. I hope you continue to be the determined (for getting things, read material objects, that you want) girl that you are.

On that note, I love you the most!

Papa.

Letter to Aindri on her 10th birthday

 Dearest jhia,

You are 10!

Reflecting on the chaotic, tense, on the tenterhooks morning that this day was a decade back, it seems like a long way; and yet it seems just like yesterday. The heaviness of having to handle a 1185 grams premature child made 10 years look eons away back then. But, here we are, today, on yet another milestone, of you having made 10 rounds around the sun!

Your constant, year long, infective (irritating too), effervescent enthusiasm for your birthday continues into this year as well. And it is a lovely thing to have. Never let it go. Never let the cynicisms of growing older take away from you this keenness, this desire, this self love.

The year began as usual for us on your 9th birthday; and this time Jema, Jepa were with us. We decided to go a little big this time and organized your birthday at Fortune Inn Valley View. The regular, dear friends were invited and everyone turned up - about 40 of them. The highlight, your birthday cake, as per your demand (and you are making a lot of them now) was a mermaid cake. Your mother baked a stunning looking and delicious tasting one. She spent the whole morning making the layered cake, with fondant work, a colorful one, which wowed everyone in the evening. You were happy for your friends had come in large numbers and all of you got a lot of space to play.

Jepa had his knee surgery after a few days and was recuperating at home for a long time. You were a good kid helping with stuff. Later in the same month, we went to Benaras to attend Shyamsundar mama's wedding. North of India in the chilling cold was a first for you. It was excruciatingly cold for us, but we had fun nevertheless. You met a lot of people, ad so did I, and for the first time in all these years, a lot of people from your mother's side. We went to the Kashi Vishwanath temple in wee hours, had kachori sabzi, malaiyo, etc. It was a fun trip.

After we got back, you fell ill. There was fever and it got exacerbated on taking the antibiotics. We were worried, you were running very high fever. It turned out you are allergic to sulfa antibiotics. This is something you need to remember going forward though. Well, March came and I got busy with Utsav as usual. But by now we had planned our second Europe trip.

This time the plan was to visit the Scandinavian countries. As usual, the planning had followed several weeks. We flew through Munich, Germany this time. The snow clad Alps as we descended to Munich was a sight to behold. We went to Stockholm then. This time we had decided to spend more time with family in Stockholm compared to the previous edition in 2022. 

The unique thing that was planned by Badda and Meshu was to have a cruise tour. We went to the beautiful capital of Estonia, Tallin. You had in fact, as preparation, learnt a song on Estonia. The cruise was interesting. Later we went to the beautiful Norway. First, we went to the capital Oslo and then to the breathtaking Bergen. The Oslo-Bergen train was a picturesque one - we saw so much snow for the first time. From Bergen we flew to Copenhagen, the capital of Denmark. Museums, palaces, canal tour - it was fun. Earlier in Skansen in Stockholm, where you enjoyed a lot, you had a new shoe which was not very comfortable and you had twisted your foot. That was an irritant throughout the rest of the trip.

The trip was loaded with good food, be it the delectable waffle just below the apartment or lunch at the Belgian restaurant in Tallin, or the fresh blueberries & strawberries. You needed Indian food, so did I, once in a while and we even had Biriyani from the Indian restaurant at Citybox Bergen. You purchased, was gifted, your requirement of stationery, etc, and thus ended the Europe trip.

We drove to Goa, another first, during the Independence Day holidays. We stayed at South Goa and it was a wonderful time - with a majority of time spent in the swimming pool, which you don't seem to get enough of. We went to Mumbai for Diwali and spent 3 days there. Nani ma went with us and we had fun visiting Filmcity there. We went to Odisha in December, with you missing classes even, but it was a fun trip. We went to Puri and you will remember the jostling for darshan there for quite some time to come. We went to Nandankanan where I guess seeing the White tiger, Melanistic Tiger, Royal Bengal Tiger were highlights. We spent a lot of time with Reet & Ronil kaka.

This year we repeated your MRI brain and EEG which you were very cooperative undergoing. Your many years of partner, Sanofi suddenly stopped production of Valparin and it was a tense few weeks before we switched to the pink color, and sweeter version by Abbott. You still aren't keen on takin tablets.

This year you continued watching increasing number of movies, thanks to Netflix & Prime. You are still watching, for the thousandth time, Bheem, Shin Chan, etc. Your love for potato chips & spicy food continue unabated. This year saw new people coming into our lives. Tingiya's kid, who you have named Rishu was born in September. You secured position in school in public speaking. 

The world in the past year has only been crazy. The Israel Palestine conflict has been continuing with Israel killing a lot of Palestinians. The US saw a regime change with Donald Trump coming back to power. The Russia-Ukraine war is still continuing. South Korea had an attempted coup. 

The use of Artificial Intelligence has been on a rise. You are now familiar with what is called as ChatGPT. This is a generative AI. There are scores more and they are growing each day, getting incorporated into everything. In a few years time, by the time you are in higher education, AI would have matured a lot. It may take various shapes, we don't know yet. It may replace people in jobs, it will change the nature of jobs, it will add new dimension to different professions. The robot revolution is also gaining pace and so is space exploration, thanks to SpaceX and other private companies.

You are much more mature this year. Your sense of humor is very nice, unlike mine, which is non existent. Your passion for singing continues (you met Kavita Krishnamurty outside visa office in Bangalore). You conversations with friends is very interesting and there is this shadow of teenage which is falling forward I see.

Ten years always seemed very far off. But here we are. It feels like an achievement almost.

But then, the journey of parents is forever.

We love you the most, jhia.

Papa

.

Letter to Aindri on her 9th birthday

 My dearest jhia,

Today you turn 9!

The lovely thing about your birthday which is still going strong is your enthusiasm for it! You start pretty early in the year and it reaches the pinnacle as the year ends. I hope you continue having this excitement into your grown up years too!

For your 8^th birthday, we returned to normalcy, the normalcy of hosting friends at home. We did debate about hosting it outside somewhere but in the end we thought we can do it at our home. ‘Nani’ was there during your birthday. We had the regular set of friends and a couple of new ones who joined. You wore a blue-white dress, with a crown (rolls eyes). Your mother baked for you a beautiful cake which had one of your Barbie dolls fixed inside it (Barbie thusu cake as we called it).

For most part of the first half of the year, you were very happy with Nani being around; and as a massive change in the usual practice you started sleeping in the other room. The frequency increased gradually but in the end you liked it with Mummy Papa in ‘sundar bedroom’.

A Bangalore visit happened in late January to drop nani-ma there. We took our new car out to the beach a lot and to Mangalore more than we usually did. The Chinese restaurants (Hao Ming) became a favorite for few occasions and later so did the Rajasthani restaurant. My birthday and Mummy’s birthday arrived and we started going to Kyoto restaurant, which was a new addition to our eating places in 2023.

In mid-February we went for a very short stay to Uva meridian and the water park experience there was immensely fun! After our return from there, Budha Aja, Papa’s last surviving grandparent and one who have had a great influence on my life passed on. I went to Talcher later for the rituals. You would remember Budha Aja decently well. He loved you a lot and always said that this one is going to be a very “strong” lady. His excitement on your birth knew no bounds for his eldest grandson’s daughter is a big deal you see. We used to see him always whenever we went to Odisha so you will surely remember, or at least I hope so, few of those encounters.

Utsav happened next; you now know pretty well how it goes for me. Both Mummy and you cooperate a lot in the days leading to Utsav enabling me to work for it. You have started mimicking the phone calls, the regular people I talk to, the organizational quirks I have. Utsav 2023 was really smooth and the quality of events were top notch.

We went to Bangalore again in April. We met Tingiya that time briefly. After we were back you attended perhaps your first ever concert of a major popular singer – Shaan. It was held in KMC Greens and was a very enjoyable show. Your love for singing continued and your self-learning also continued over the year. Towards the later part of the year the use of Alexa, added a new dimension to this because now there was someone who attended the commands of playing songs.

We hosted Utsav gang people at home and were surprise visited by Suraj & Vandana, your reaction being noteworthy; you were howling on the floor at the surprise. In the month of May we went to Odisha, via Hyderabad. We went to the new home of Jepa & Jema at Vipul gardens in Bhubaneswar this time and it was lovely. It was the peak of summers and AC in all rooms were a constant feature. At this rate of global warming things are going to be very difficult. There is only one planet and I hope my generation does not spoil it beyond repair for yours.

Since it was summers there were the summer fruits and you enjoyed the mangoes and litchi a lot. Som bhaina’s thread ceremony was the major event that we had to attend and it was a first of its kind for you. You met a host of people on my side of the family. We also went to Talcher for a day in between. Cousins, food, short trips later we were back via Bangalore, getting nani-ma with us to Manipal. We came by train and you loved the experience as usual. Your detest for flights because of the smell and motion sickness continued this year too.

I had fewer trips to Bangalore last year which was greatly liked by you. Papa & Mummy got busy with their conference organization after that. It was Extended reality in healthcare and you came over and saw a bit of the virtual reality and mixed reality stuff that was around. You also liked the basic VR device last year Mummy gifted you for your birthday which requires the phone to go inside it. Well, digital natives, you all.

On Independence Day we took a road trip to Bekal Fort in Kerala. A few days later I had to go to Goa for work. Vivek uncle visited from Singapore and you were very happy to meet him. We went to Shobha aunty’s house for Ganesh Puja, a yearly ritual now.

Another first happened last year – watching circus. Rambo circus had set shop in Mangalore and we decided to go there, which was after you asked for it quite a few times. Parents, you see. Circus days I believed had long gone but the Rambo circus was a pleasant surprise which we all enjoyed.

In October, we planned a Kerala trip. After seeing off nani who headed to Kolkata, we went for a 7 day trip to Munnar, Thekkady, Aleppey/Kumarakom & Kochi. It was a good trip. While you disliked the travel through mountainous roads but the nice stay, the food (hogged at the buffets), the swimming pool were all greatly liked by you. From the hill station of Munnar with endless tea plants on hills to the great houseboat (completely for us) experience; the trip was unique.

Jema & Jepa visited shortly after and were there with us during Diwali. They left after a few weeks and we went for a short trip to Pondicherry. I think you liked it, though you surely did not like walking so much at Matri Mandir. You had pasta, and there was the amazing pink pasta at Café Coromandel, all the three nights we were at Pondy. Jema & jepa came back in the last week of December. We went out for lunch on New year’s eve and the new year day started in a not so nice way for you, with you falling off the bed and hurting your head. But you surprisingly braved it well.

The world in 2023 had its ups and downs as is the case with everything. India became the most populous country in the world. The popular narrative that it is a bad thing is not entirely correct. However we need more jobs and opportunities for the young. I hope things look up in another decade. The year was marked by great advancements in Artificial Intelligence. AI, or generative AI, is breaking barriers at a fast pace. Getting things written, getting images made, creating videos, health, entertainment, everything is seeing AI applications. By the time you are more grown up, this will become a default in many ways. It is important to understand it better and use it and use for the better.

The Israel-Palestine conflict took a very serious turn and lots of lives are still getting lost in it. If you take an interest in understanding it later in life, always remember to start from the basics, from credible books & resources and not off what just appears on the internet. In India Manipur continued to burn for large part of the year.

The world is becoming narrower in many aspects sadly. Narrower in thoughts and action. Bigotry, majoritarianism, protectionism, shutting doors, lay-offs are on the rise. One can only hope that things get better for the younger generations. This hope is also ‘from’ the younger generations who need to shed the narrowness. A short life that we all have is not worth the pettiness, the conflicts, even though they may look lucrative on the exterior. I hope you will understand this when you are older. It is dichotomous for on one had we are closer to space travel, closer to solutions to a lot of diseases yet on the other hand are held back by conflicts, of mind and on ground.

Anyway, you still continued not liking to go to school, but it got better than earlier. You are doing well academically, thanks to Mummy who is in charge for it majorly. You continued reading books though you still want me or Mummy to read them to you. I guess you are just pushing your luck. You have of late started pushing your luck about wearing shoes with higher heels. Not happening. You are growing tall. Your love for potato chips is unending.

You still have the carefree childhood in you; which sadly does not remain after a certain time (for most of us). I seriously hope you continue having a major strain of that. It is important.

I love you the most, and will always do so.

Papa.

Letter to Aindri on her 8th birthday

 My darling jhia,

Today you turn 8 years old.

Your excitement for your birthday continues unabated and it is a lovely thing to have. I hope for you to continue having this excitement all your life long.

For your 7th birthday, since the COVID-19 pandemic was not well in control, we decided to do an outdoor birthday again. Remember, the 6h one was at the beach! We zeroed in on Tree Park, the one right beside TAPMI. The usual suspects were invited, your dear friend Tingia turned up from Bangalore, food was ordered to be delivered right at the park, and the theme of the birthday was the one thing you were obsessed with at that time - Elsa (of the Frozen fame). You had an Elsa dress to wear (with a cape and all), the decoration stuff were of that theme, and yes, your mother, continuing the tradition of baking your birthday cakes herself, made one with the Elsa theme. It was a good outing. You kids played a little bit post the celebration.

The year saw you going to school regularly as the shadow of Covid slowly dissipated. While academically you have been doing very good, a matter of deep concern was about your lunch. The slightly picky eater that you are (and I plead guilty on that count), your mother took on this task of catering to your demands and preparing wide variety of snacks and lunch. By the end of the year you started adapting to 'hot lunch' at school. Time shall tell how long that trend will continue.

We went to Odisha in April, braving the summer in Talcher. You fell ill with viral enteritis and it was a tough time. Later we watched a play (your first in fact), Ahe Nila Shaila in Bhubaneswar and you enjoyed the experience. We again went to Odisha in July, though just for three days, because your friend Tingia was getting married and no way we could miss it. Some relations, that we build ourselves, must be valued; and relationships take work to be maintained.

There was a lot of uncertainty going on about the fate of MMMC, where we work, and that occupied our thoughts for a large part of the year. But amidst all that we embarked on what would turn out as the highlight of 2022 - the Europe trip. We were very unsure, how it would go with you, for we had never travelled that long and that far earlier. The planning and preparation, which you witnessed closely, went on for months. We did it all by ourselves and with all the aspirations and aspersions undertook the journey on August 28.

We visited Stockholm where our family members live and had a great time there. We went to the gorgeous Amsterdam, to the beautiful Ghent & Bruges, then the tourist haven of Paris. You were super cooperative and walked on and on while we enjoyed these lovely European cities. You must be commended for that for in a day we used to hit more than 15k steps. You adjusted to the food too. It was a unique experience and to cherish it we have made an album of the photos and memorabilia collected. I hope you will remember the Louvre (which was a dream for me when I read the book by Dan Brown) and the Mona Lisa in it. I hope you will remember the thousands of cyclists and the beautiful canals in Amsterdam. I hope you will remember the city tour and metros of Stockholm and above all the good time spent with family. 

Your 'nani' came back from Stockholm with us and you have enjoyed the pampering of a grandparent of late. I can see that it has instilled in you the art of being demanding, but it is all fun. You started learning Karate this year and after a few sessions grew bored with it. You have started going to music classes recently. You want to join dance classes too. It is all good to try new things. Some things will stick others won't, but remember nothing will come easy. Play also needs a dedication like work for it to transform into a habit.

A lot happened in the world. Russia and Ukraine went into war and which disrupted many things. Lives were lost, economic downturn came about, geopolitical crisis continues as I write this. Wars are never good you see. Queen Elizabeth died, when we were in Stockholm. Football World Cup was won by Argentina and the g.o.a.t (not the animal) Messi got his due (though we didn't watch the WC). Countries like Iran saw women asking for their rights, and the protests continued for months. China saw protests as well and by the end of the year the Covid situation there worsened. The World started plating Wordle. Artificial Intelligence took an interesting turn with ChatGPT (I wonder how you kids will write assignments 8-10 years from now). The James Webb Space Telescope sent pictures back and we learnt so much about space and stars and galaxies.

After a break of two years, the last time when you danced to "Bhumro bhumro" and was also am emcee for the program, your school had the Annual Day in November. Endless practice (rolls eyes) for the dance-drama 'Punyakoti' ensued and you were pretty excited to be a cow. You were equally disappointed when you were replaced as an emcee this time. Showed how much you cared for it. Good thing. Perhaps will motivate you to try harder for things that matter to you.

The end of the year also brought an end to the long run we have had with the car! The car that was of your 'Nanu' and got passed on to your Ma. The car in which you came home from hospital after your month-and-a-half stint in NICU. The car in which we went to places we could - those tens of visits to beaches, restaurants, school-of-course. Material things do become a part of our life for they are associated with the memories we make. But material things are material things at the end of the day. We finally, and on the new year day, brought home a new car. I hope we get to create memories and much better ones in this one too.

As I write this letter, this year we are planning to have your birthday at home this time. The usual suspects have been invited. You have become tad bit greedy with wanting large number of gifts.

You are growing fast and growing tall! You are exhibiting a sense of humor which is a nice thing (I am bad at that anyway). Some teenagy behavior is also being observed which is, at least not yet, giving us sleepless nights. Your compassion and understanding of things continues to surprise us sometimes. Hope you keep that up. It is essential to be a good person, everything else comes next or rather follows.

Always remember, we love you the most.

Papa

Letter to Aindri on her 6th birthday

 My dear Jhia,

2020.

A year in which way too many things happened and at the same time, nothing much happened either.

I have been thinking if it can be called bittersweet. Maybe it can maybe it is more bitter than sweet, but that is a different debate.

We celebrated your 5th birthday in that club house of Orchid Lake View, Bangalore. Your nanu could attend despite his failing health and we had a few people coming over and it turned out to be a good evening. You were ecstatic with the Elsa themed cake and all the balloon decoration. 

I had to again in a few days time go to Bangalore and got nanu admitted to hospital on 22nd January. We all had to go then in the beginning of February. While we adults knew the inevitable was around, everyone at home was worried about you, that how would you take it. I was deeply concerned. 

Your nanu "became a star" on 19th of February and you surprised us all with taking the whole thing so well. You understood everything; you were much more mature for your age and you could process what was happening and what we told you.

We returned to Manipal on 3rd March and in a few days time things would go horribly wrong with the world. The World Health Organization (WHO), on 11th March declared the outbreak of coronavirus pandemic. Such an event hadn't occurred in a 100 years. Soon after the Indian government announced one of the strictest lockdowns starting March 24. There was fear all around, the Covid-19 cases were rising steadily. While children were not getting affected by the virus, there was little known back then and everyone (at least us) was on tenterhooks.

Lockdown was upon us and we were confined to our home. It was nice to be around with you all the time. We tried new dishes at home, gradually we went out for a walk in the evenings, we played at home, learnt new things and yes, we gobbled up books.

Your love for books continued this year. We re-read the whole ACK 3-part Mahabharata; we got new Julia Donaldson books, we graduated to Ruskin Bond, Sudha Murthy, etc. Be it while eating, bedtime, reading stories to you have been one major job that I have been, and when not feeding you (which you refuse to do with rice-dal in afternoons) your mother have been doing. Not happy with books you also have been listening to on-the-spot-made-up stories.

One of the books you got as a gift on your 5th, 100 Rebel Girl Stories, your mother with her innovative skills dressed you up as Cleopatra one time, Ruth Vader Ginsberg another time, and other famous personalities, photographic proof of all of which exists.

While we are lucky to have these comforts, there were millions of underprivileged people who walked thousands of kilometers to their homes after everything shut down due to lockdowns. It was a painful sight. I tried sending money to a few people hoping it would help them. The pandemic has brought India's economy to a very dangerous place. While it will be some time before you understand these, but I for one am concerned about you in 2020, for the promise that India holds for its citizens, for little girls like you wrests in its economic development which because of a poor economic show might get delayed and so will get delayed the opportunities for young children like you. The ugly social divisions that are surfacing are also cause of concern for little ones like you should not grow in such toxic environments. But the hope also wrests with a little more older to you generation, who should take India to a place where there is peace and prosperity.

World over the pandemic wreaked havoc with medical systems in high income, developed countries like the USA, being unable to cope, all of it leading to lot of people dying. By the time I write this letter to you, amazing scientific development has given humankind the vaccine against coronavirus in record time and millions of people have been vaccinated already in Western countries. In a few months time, we too should be getting it. 

Anyway, you got familiar with all these pandemic terms pretty soon. You amazed us with perfecting the hand washing technique and have been doing it diligently after coming back home when we go out. You in fact had a bout of fever mid-year which worried us to no end, but it was fine. 

Your school has been operating on WhatsApp and you did very well at the short speeches, etc, that were assigned to you. So much so that on Water Conservation Day you were requested to give a short speech which you did really well. Your singing sojourn continues, and especially with old Hindi songs. And guess what, you have been making these 'self songs', lyrics of which are pretty situational and apt. This one time, you sang that Kannada song fully, which you had picked up without our knowledge, and it blew our mind.

You took to watching Ninja Hattori in the first half of the year and Paw Patrol, Peppa, Masha in towards the end of the year. There have been some silver lining amidst the grey clouds of 2020, in the form of your Papa acquiring his PhD degree on 23rd November and your mother registering for it three days prior to that date. I don't know if you will ever have the interest to open my thesis book, but know that the acknowledgement section begins with me telling you the lines that Prospero said to his daughter Miranda in Shakespeare's The Tempest.

The lines are: Oh, a cherubim, Thou wast that did preserve me. Thou didst smile.. (Act 1, Scene2)

In this year, largely since we did not go out much; we only went to one or two colleagues house that too in December when cases in Udupi were pretty low, we went quite a few times to the beach, which you enjoy a lot. We haven't been to the mountains with you yet, so as of now you seem to be a beach girl. 

I cannot but feel astonished at your resilience at the face of all that happened in 2020. For a kid of your age it is essential and imperative to go out, to mingle with friends, to socialize at school and none of which happened. But you adjusted well to everything. 

2020 has been a difficult year with a few silver linings. When and if you read this, and with the advantage of hindsight you will realize what a landmark year it was.

I love you the mostest!

Papa

Letter to Aindri on her 5th birthday

Dearest Aindri,

I love you the most.

You are now a 5-year old child. When we began, 5 years seemed such a distant place, but here we are. 5 years ago we were a nervous lot, with apprehensions galore, and now, 5 years later, we are better.

This past year has been marked by quite the regular things I must say. You have been growing taller. You are a 3.1 feet tall girl now. You have been regularly going to school and I am sure enjoying it too. You have made a great friend in Sanvi and the ritual of hugging bye at the end of the school is adorable. In this year you have learnt all the letters, capital and small, numbers till twenty, many new rhymes, songs at school, dance for annual day, etc, etc.

We have continued our reading together habit this year too. Notably, we read the three part 'Mahabharata' of Amar Chitra Katha, which Sudhakar dadu was so kind to give us when we visited him once. So much so that we have now started re-reading book one.

Predictably, you took to watching TV a bit more than previous year and you have shifted from watching Doraemon to Ninja Hatori (ding ding). Your picking old Hindi songs like 'pyaar humen kis mod pe le aya', 'ek chatura naar' has been interesting. Your love for dance continues, with you sitting through our CCC programs, be it Mohiniattam, Bharatnatyam or even the play by Naya theater the other day. Also, definitely not inspired by your mother, you have grown a penchant for getting dolled up in this past year.

The world for a 5 year old is not very wide, but in the wide world we live in, 2019 has been one that of turmoil. The US, the most powerful nation int he world, has a buffoon for a President, called Donald Trump. There is something called Brexit, which is otherwise complex but then will suffice to understand that UK is to discontinue part of being the larger Europe. North Korea continued to play hide-and-seek with nuclear weapons. India elected a BJP government in this year, the policies of which is affecting both Indian economy and social fabric negatively. Yes, the happenings in India concerns me about your future, as it very much did when you were born; especially since the majority of the country does not respect women as it should. But preserve we shall and shine we shall. There is always light at the end of the tunnel.

Back home, your Nanu had been battling with his cancer and you have become familiar with the terms chemotherapy, bilirubin, etc, which you hear us talking about. Only when you are a certain age, you will realize, there is so much to learn from the way he is battling it out. We could not go out anywhere much this year other than a few trips to Bangalore and one to Odisha. When we went to Odisha we had a fun trip to Puri when so many of our family went in a big bus. You of all things, wore a saree, to Jagannath temple, and had to be lifted for most part of it.

In the past few days your excitement for your birthday had grown to dizzying heights with you having decided quite sometime back that the theme of your birthday would be 'Frozen'. So, some Elsa stuff has been gotten for you. This year we are celebrating your birthday at Bangalore with your maternal side of the family with your aunt having come down from Sweden, and will be inviting few close friends there. You are excited that it will be in club house at Orchid Lake View Apartment. You have become a chatter box, and that has been a source of great joy for all of us.

We don't know what is in store in the year ahead, or philosophically, in the very next moment. I don't know when you would be ready to read these letters, or if I will be able to continue this tradition of writing these letters. Nothing is certain in life and thus we have to live to the fullest in the present. You see, new age liberal parenting, is a tricky thing, and we hope we are managing fine with it. I am liking this letter writing tradition and I hope one day you will get to read these, to understand how you were and to understand what your father is/was.

Happy birthday kichlu michlu.

Love

Papa

Letter to Aindri on her:
1st birthday: https://sambitspeak.blogspot.com/2016/01/a-letter-to-my-daughter.html
2nd birthday: https://sambitspeak.blogspot.com/2017/01/letter-to-aindri-on-her-2nd-birthday.html
3rd birthday: https://sambitspeak.blogspot.com/2018/01/letter-to-aindri-on-her-3rd-birthday.html
4th birthday: https://sambitspeak.blogspot.com/2019/01/letter-to-aindri-on-her-4th-birthday_2.html 

Letter to Aindri on her 4th birthday

Darling Chimpu,

First things first, I love you the most!

Am happy that you too have been saying 'i love you' a lot of late.

The year 2018 in which you transitioned from your 3rd to 4th year was a very tough one. Very could as well be an understatement.

Early in the year your maternal grandfather, Nanu, fell ill and then very ill with an excruciating treatment regime. When you grow up you will understand what this thing called cancer is. Your mother was down with back pain in the first half of the year. You will learn later what slip disc is. And then, you my child, were also not well on two occasions this last year. Very soon, we will explain you about this thing called epilepsy.

While these things preoccupied all of us for the greater part of the year, it is not these matters of ill health that remain as highlights in our life. It is rather the grit shown at the face of these eventualities that mark the character of human beings. And grit shown was aplenty.

Nanu fought well and fought brave and has been winning battles.You have seen and are seeing how near normal he is with you. Decades of discipline has helped him in this course. I hope you imbibe that quality of his, a hallmark of great individuals. Your mother started exercising, all by herself and at home and which has helped her fix this back issue to a very large extent. Steadfastness and the headstrong attitude if you can learn from her will help you go a long way. And you, in your capacity, have been so cooperative amidst all these hardships that we could not have asked for more.

We did manage to sneak a Goa trip, two trips to Odisha and a few trips to Bangalore this year. Though we would have wanted to take you to more places, but the year was not particularly helpful. The way you enjoy Goa, possibly because that is one place you have already been thrice in 4 years of your life, makes me wonder if a long term goal in life should be to buy a property there.

A lot is happening in the world to which you are oblivious at this age, but when you grow up and are ever interested in history and/or politics, which i secretly hope you do, you will see back in time that the world was getting embroiled in narrow nationalism, climate change becoming more visible and threatening, rise in protectionism, changing global order, etc. At the same time the advancement of humankind in terms of science and technology is set at a fast pace with machine learning, artificial intelligence being set to transform the way things have been done until now. Forget the world, as of now, more about you..

Remarkably, you went to school in 2018. Nursery in Madhav Kripa School, Manipal, has been an important landmark. When you won 1st prize in singing, which you really do have a penchant for, and 2nd prize in dancing, you made us very happy. Please remember, we would be equally happy had you not won anything. When we watched you dance in your annual day we teared up. Surprisingly and very impressively you have taken to identifying cars as they move on road very well. You identify models and makes with ease and this has surprised people to no end.

So, we celebrated your birthday with our 'regular' fried circle of nearly 40 people coming home, your mother baking a Spongebob cake, which you demanded and you getting loads of gift which worryingly includes 8 new clothes (how many can you have!?). Hope you enjoyed it and will remember it for some time to come.

Wish you a great year ahead, filled importantly with good health and peace.

Love

Papa

PS: IF you notice in the last year I have written only 2 posts in my blog, (i have been writing more for popular press) one being a letter on your 3rd birthday. This year i plan to write more here including things that you might like reading later.

Letter to Aindri on her 3rd birthday

My dear Chimpu,

You are 3 years old now. 

This past year can be called as the ‘year of the gab’. Yes, you started talking and you did talk a lot of it, and along with it many scores of things that melts heart.

Hindi, Odia, English and Kannanda, in the decreasing order were what you learnt and spoke. Your love for songs continued unabated. You sang more, sang better I must admit and sang variety. However it was dance with which you entertained us. 

The year 2017 (and I think being a 2^nd Jan kid, it will be easy to keep a tab of the year easily) began fine with your birthday which was well attended and was a nice little function. Luckily the gifts you received are mostly intact after a year. You have not been, until now, the kid who smashes things. The operative phrase there is until now.

We made a quick trip to Goa in the last week of March and as it always is, we were mighty apprehensive about you and travel. But it was a good road trip by Biju mamu’s car. Well, how much your parents love Goa came to the fore when we repeated the trip, this time by train, in November. The second time around we were a little relaxed and let you play in the pool from where you refused to come. Trisha nani and Hitesh fufaa also made a visit then and met us.

The past year will also be marked by another special event. You started going to school. Having decided to send you to a small school, Minions, close by to home, we were happy that you were happy to go there. But that lasted just for a couple of days. You were in no mood to go there. Now since 2^nd of December you have been going to Sonia play school and continuing your routine of crying for an hour in total! It is distressing for us; yet, the routine has to be set. So, sorry if you feel we have been cruel.

You have grown taller, almost reaching my waist in this year. Your food time tantrums are on a rise. Given the premature baby that you are, I am wondering if you are picking these naughty habits a little late! But your love for shawarma from Dishes, American Onion and Cheese potato chips, donuts from Crave, they are all fine. Which makes me think, you are becoming a bit like your father, being fastidious about food?

Your sleeping habits continued to keep us up for a large part of the year but they were better than the previous year. When your mother had to be admitted for inter vertebral disc prolapse (don’t worry about the jargon) you acted very mature by going alone with me, letting me put you to sleep, give you food, bathe you, etc. The way you spent the evening with your friend Tingia when we had to go to emergency will always be remembered by us.

The world in 2017 is a strange place. You will be easily bored to learn about the society, the politics, the geopolitics, that is shaping the world but at some point in your life you will perhaps understand it all. As a parent, I hope humankind keeps striving to make the world a better place for kids like you for when you grow up you should inhabit a place that is befitting for the energy, the enthusiasm, the vibrancy of your youth.

Well, the year had two set of visits from Jema and jepa and nanu and nani ma. It is now clear that people visiting us and your becoming naughty are interrelated. They all love you a lot, much more than what you can think. 

Again, there were plenty of times this past year when we thought if we were doing the parenting act fine. I thought I was being upset with you when you would throw a thing, not eat, not listen, and it was much more than before. If I have been unreasonable (and I am sure defying what impression a tiny tot like you give, you kids understand all that) then I am apologetic. 

We are all set for your birthday. Hoping all things good come your way this year and you have the courage to fight the not-so-good..

Love you loads!

Papa

Letter to Aindri on her 2nd birthday

My dear Chimpu,

It seems that this name is sticking on to you despite your mother having decided for a lovely 'Nysha' as your pet name.

But even if it gets replaced by something else, in this letter, it is going to stay so.
At 2, you have become taller, noticeably, and little thinner (rather less chubby than first).

Year 2016, has particularly been a weird year. I would be with a lot of people to believe that it was not really a great year.
Definitely not for us with you being hospitalized twice, once in June and other in October.

But the remarkable thing about both of these incidences, which was heartbreaking for us to say the least, was the grit that you exhibited.

For a tiny tot, going through rigors of hospital, it was from you that we derived strength.

Let's put aside these bad memories...
In your second year, we moved into our own house, precisely on 4th September, 2016.

You got a lot of space to run around which you did really well. We think you like the house. Well, like it or not you have to stay here.

We made our regular trips to Bangalore and Odisha and you seem to be making our airport visits very tiring. That is because you refuse to be at one place even for a minute.

Also you became choosy with food and making your mother's job pretty difficult. Plus, there is something that has been another hallmark of your second year.
That of you keeping us awake for large parts of the night. You wake up at unearthly hours and refuse to sleep for hours at stretch.

You have now begun to sing many nursery rhymes, thanks to all the YouTube videos we 'have' to show you just so that you eat. Also in the meantime Doraemon cartoon has replaced all others as your favorite. (So much so that your mother is baking a doraemon cake on your birthday).

You have a liking for Bollywood songs, be it Bolna, Gerua, Janam janam, ae dil hai mukkil or others and you are humming couple and more lines of them. That makes me think you can start learning singing sometime later. You have started identifying restaurants, be it associating fish at Ocean Pearl or MTR.

By now you have graduated from monosyllables to 6-7 word sentences. And most of which makes perfect sense. And in the process you have learnt how to butter your mother and me and get things done.

Sometimes I wonder if we have been good enough parents in this year. I think it is a genuine concern that most would be having. Trust you me chimpu, we have tried.

In your third year there will come a bigger challenge and perhaps a big reason for your Papa to be worried, of you going to crutch or some equivalent of that. It is true that we are a little overprotective of you but that will be let loose gradually.

At this point I hope the blog sustains few years until when you are able to read it and understand it. Also I hope I will be able to continue writing these on your birthdays.

With all the love in the world...

Papa

PS: The clear, innocent eyes with which you watch me and your smile and laughter are things which melts the heart.